Roots of Balance Coaching Blog

Let’s talk about one of the quietest, most insidious wounds I see in my coaching practice: the deep, gnawing belief that “something is wrong with me.”  For some, it shows up as the whisper, “I am defective,”  the sense that—at your core—you are broken in a way that no amount of fixing can heal. It’s a wound often carried by those with a Dismissive Avoidant attachment style, and it shapes the way you relate, retreat, and try (and fail) to protect yourself from ever being truly

There’s a silent ache that so many of us carry, sometimes buried deep, sometimes sitting right on the surface of our hearts: What if I am unlovable? It’s a question that’s rarely spoken out loud. Instead, it shows up in the quiet moments—when we shrink away from connection, when we doubt the intentions of those who care about us, or when we sabotage relationships before they can get too close. The “I am unlovable” wound can shape an entire life if left unseen. How Does This W

There’s a story that quietly shapes so many of our lives—a story that whispers (or sometimes screams), “You’re not enough.”  Not smart enough. Not attractive enough. Not successful enough. Not anything enough. Amidst self-reflection, negative thoughts can overshadow self-worth, leading to diminished motivation. Where the Wound Begins The “I am not enough” wound is often formed in the subtle spaces: Growing up in comparison—maybe to a sibling, a parent’s high expectations, or

There’s a heaviness that sits on the chest for many of us—a deep-seated sense that no matter how much we do, achieve, or give, it will never quite be enough. This is the “I am unworthy” wound: the belief that you don’t deserve love, care, belonging, or good things—simply because of who you are. A thoughtful child gazes into the distance, reflecting the complexity of childhood and the lasting impact of mixed messages on self-worth. Where It Begins The “I am unworthy” wound oft

There’s a voice that lives in the quiet corners of so many minds—a whisper, sometimes a shout, that says: “I am bad." This core wound is insidious, often planted in childhood by criticism, shame, punishment, or chronic disapproval. Maybe it came from caregivers who held impossibly high standards, or a world that seemed to reflect back only your mistakes, not your goodness. A serene moment captures the delicate interplay of reality and perception, as a woman's reflection in ri

We all have them—those hidden splinters buried deep beneath the surface. They’re the old stories, handed down or picked up along the way, that quietly dictate how we move through the world. Core wounds are those primal beliefs etched into our bones: “I am unlovable.” “I am not enough.” “I am too much.” “I am bad.” Sometimes, we don’t even know they’re there until life bumps up against them and suddenly, ouch—there they are, raw as ever. Most of us spend years trying to outrun

A glowing connection: The lasting impact of childhood experiences on adult emotions. We all carry invisible stories—wounds from our earliest experiences that continue to shape the way we see ourselves, others, and the world. These “core wounds” aren’t just fleeting hurts; they are the foundational beliefs etched into us from childhood, shaped by our families, caregivers, and the world around us. They live under the surface, whispering narratives like “I am not enough,” “I am